"Ms. Sharma!" The pitch of her voice dropped with a thud in my mind, like a pebble thrown into an ocean creating ripples in my thoughts. "Hmm"? I replied as my gaze lazily traveled up the length of her body that was draped in a spotless white sari, hugging her slim physique "We are ready for you. Follow me." She turned around and began walking. I remained planted in my seat, my feet locked into the seams in between the chairs. "Argh! My mind silently screamed while I tried twitching my body wishing to move. Okay, now this seems too suspicious to be true. Moreover, my lips feel like it has stitches running through it, my voice resumed yearning for an escape that was nowhere to be found. I watch her walk away, praying that she would turn around. The clock wound down and it was too late. Somewhere in the back of my mind I knew that fate had it planned in this way. The woman managed to fade away into an abyss that was suddenly ripped in the corner of the room. The anticipation resumed, as darkness fully consumed my gaze. I refused to look away as if I had assumed that soon she'd come back. It was than that the seams seemed to shower its pity on me giving me the power to move by freeing my feet. It triggered the sensation of a discrete release, similar to the seed that he planted inside of me. Nonetheless I was free and had to ditch the bittersweet memories of that night. So I skipped up off my seat but just as I lifted up my feet to begin proceeding to where I needed to be, I tripped, palms first, on the cold concrete. "SHIT!!! The pain!!!" I screamed in vain as blood oozed through tiny slits in my skin surrounding what remained of my flesh.
"Ms. Sharma, get up!"
My eyes lit up at the thought that she might be back. I looked up to confirm the fact and yes my guess was correct, it was the same woman who had addressed me before. I got up off floor and with my bloody palms I brushed the dust off of my kameez and looked up astonishingly at the change in the scene that was suddenly laid out in front of me. There were no chairs just a bed in the spotlight of a room. And the lady whom was sitting on the bed entered into some sort of this weird reverse metamorphosis because suddenly right before me sits the most beautiful child with her arms crossed across her chest. Her brown eyes expressed a thin line between a sincere request and sheer protest. My heart beat dangerously almost as if this child was more than just a stranger to me. What was stranger to me was figuring out why she was staring so angrily at me.
A gulp dared to rustle down my throat while my mind eloped in a maze, searching for the meaning in her gaze.
She spoke while maintaining the same poise. The comfort in her voice equipped my nerves with a force of joy. A feeling that in my life, I felt was destroyed.
"Mumma!" she boasted, confidently.
"Huh"? I whimpered semi-consciously, still processing the events surrounding me. She called me mumma and my heart believes that she is my child, undoubtedly.
"I am mad at you and daddy. Parents are supposed to protect their child but you and Dad's immaturity got me killed."
"No Baachi, you are still alive I swear. I only teased the thought of an abortion but now you're not going anywhere.
"THAN WHY ARE YOU HERE?" she hollered, spanning her arms in the air as far as she could reach. "WHY ARE YOU IN THE HOSPITAL AND WHY AM I BEING FORCED TO LEAVE?" the hollows in the walls swallowed the echoes from her shriek, her neck became weak, and her tiny palms enveloped the weight of her face.
Her sobbing triggered the awakening of an aching in my heart that thus far was beyond any throbbing that I felt. Her tears fueled my steps as I anxiously pelt forward. Getting close to the edge of the bed, I knelt toward her. I felt no words were enough to convey my remorse but a touch may employ a level of trust to soften the rough patches. Nothing in this world could match the despair in my soul watching her sit there sobbing. Her palm stuck up mid-air stopping my hand dead in its track, frozen in its path with no desire to pull back. The sight of crystal tears swelling up in her eyes made my heart clench as tight as slap. She opened her mouth and to my surprise her words carried the same painful impact.
"You can't touch me mumma I don't exist."
"Please baby, don't punish me like this."
" I don't have a choice. I no longer have a place in this world. And you and Dad were supposed to protect me; I'm your baby girl. But he doesn't want me and you don't want him but I need both of you."
I go to touch her but all I grasp is the thin air holding her fading figure. The taste of realization is bitter knowing that I only have a few seconds remaining with her.
"Please I promise it'll be you and I. I will die protecting you. If he doesn't want you I will never have you around him"
"Don't you get it momma? You can't have me without him!"
She smiles apathetically and begins stating hypothetically, "When you pray for something from the bottom of your heart, god tears each and every page of destiny apart and works his magic. So if you really want it Momma, one day you can have it."
I remain awestruck listening to her words that gave me a bit of hope. But hope is only given birth to when there is situation that has the chance to sooth and/or hurt you.
"I want you so much" I professed desperately.
She pressed her palm up against the thin airy barrier in front of my chest creating a pressure that excruciatingly progressed. "Momma, I guess its goodbye for now. But the next time we meet, we will be together forever." In between her speech, I hear her voice drown in the sound of beeps. She is no longer in front of me, now all I see is darkness surrounding me. I feel the pain in my chest again, this time the pressure is hard. Sparks crusade through my body as I begin to fade admiring the glimmering stars around me.
Ayesha dug her cold, lanky fingers into Priya's flesh and began to shake her frantically. Ayesha: Di... Di...wake up Di... Di please. MA!! PAPA!!
Her voice galloped off the walls and into her parent's perked up ears that were waiting for her call. These past few months they all slept with one eye open, hoping that she wouldn't have that nightmare again. But destiny was an enemy that claimed to be her friend, finding pleasure in sending her into a torturous frenzy that refused to end. Four pairs of naked feet slapped the cold tiles while the clock ticked quarter to three. Shipra picked up her speed and anxiously whipped open the door. Rushing into the room, she crept next to Priya who was now sitting upright, resting the back of her aching head against the headboard.